Are We Really Being Nice?

My friend told me about how she got into a disagreement with a client and the “nice person” in her took over and she offered all of the client’s money back. It was an important payment to her and the conclusion about who was right was dubious.

I started thinking about what exactly it means to be a “nice person”. There are different aspects to consider. Since I wasn’t there I can’t pass judgment on this one. I might have done the same thing. But here are some thoughts on situations like this in general.

Giving in quickly without a full exchange can be unsatisfying especially if we resent the interaction later.  Our thoughts and feelings need to be voiced.  Are there compromises to be considered? Could the fee be split? Does it require further exploration from the third party involved? We owe it to ourselves to take a moment and assess the options without going into the giving in or resisting mode instantly.

To me being nice is being clear. It is being respectful and considerate. It is coming from a strong inner presence that values the other person’s needs as well as our own. I’d love to hear about your experiences in this area. Please share!

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