A debilitating cold and cough have made me stop unpacking from my trip to NY and sit quietly on my porch to reflect.
This was the first time that I went back east since moving to Santa Fe. Such different cultures and rhythms! Earphones have become an appendage that have to be disengaged if a person were to answer my question. I wonder what future generations will look like if Darwinian theory of evolution applies to earphones. Garbage lining the streets, ambient lighting day and night, screaming sirens, race-walking even when there is no reason to rush. On the other hand, there is the vitality and excitement of a city that draws from all corners of the earth. Who wouldn’t feel a rush in the pulsating light of Times Square at night or enjoy cuisine from exotic cultures?
But, I am not here to make a comparison chart of our two coasts. This is my time to think about what I learned from the trip. Since I got home, I have been rushing from one chore to another feeling drained and depleted. Frenetic energy is not the sole providence of big cities. It took this cold and fever to make me stop and understand that my energy needs to be conserved or it leaks. I felt depleted each time I tried to answer questions about my move to people who are not able to understand. How could I explain that my heart soars when I see a snow-capped mountain sparkling in the sunshine like a jewel? Or, how it took my breath away to be united once again to the ever-changing dominance of the sky? Or, how delightful it was to get off the plane and hear strangers laughing together? Or, how I chuckled at seeing my car in long-term parking from the door of the airport?
I am becoming aware of how often I allow my energy to precede me, explain me, connect me, soothe others because of me. Sitting consciously and quietly with my hand over my solar plexus makes me feel like I am turning off the faucet. This time of replenishing, receiving, and restoring is life-affirming. A recent study showed that it takes 25 minutes for us to recover from a phone call. Maybe I learned that I need to carve out a sacred space for myself wherever I am. Nowhere to go and no need to explain anything. When I make that a priority, the rest will be a piece of cake.
Beautifully said. <3
Dear Ellie,
I often think about you in Santa Fe and I am so happy for you that you made the move. I just come back form St Martin and re-adjusting to Long Island is difficult. It is just a different world and it seems that your body is responding to it. Enjoy the sun, the beauty that surrounds you in Santa Fe and what seems to be a more relax attitude towards life.
Much love,
Hi Ellie, Nice to read this piece and to think of you considering Santa Fe your home.
It sounds like this place is for you