People come into and out of our lives, often for reasons that we don’t understand. When a person leaves a friendship or love relationship it is so easy to take it personally. When someone criticizes or withdraws attention, it looks like it was something that we did. But often it is not! It reflects what they are feeling and needing regardless of who we are and what we have to offer. Don’t take it personally unless you feel that you can learn from it. You don’t know why and might never know.
I had a very close friend who left the friendship for reasons that I didn’t understand at the time and am still not clear about. As devastating as it was then, I realize that it was the best thing for me because I had the freedom to grow into my true self without following her lead. What I came to understand was that her leaving was about her, not me.
We are having a party for my Mom’s birthday in September. I asked her to focus on the people who will be able to attend. “If you are sad and thinking about the people who can’t come, you will miss being with the people who showed up. Next time others will be there. We rarely get everyone at each function, and who would have the time to be with so many people anyway?”
Be with the people who show up in every situation. Be with those who show up for you and release them when they need to move on…or you need to move on.
This one really resonated with me!! Thanks for your insight Ellie. . . as always!