We were told to pick a partner for the exercise. Luckily Sue was near me. I like to work with her. Here were the instructions:
The first person puts her leg on the other’s shoulder or hip (maybe to be off-balance or vulnerable?), cradles her partner’s head in her hands and the partner tilts her head forward and confides some of her insecurities to the first person who is listening without comment. Then, reverse the exercise. Each person had a chance to be off-balance and then switch to whisper her insecurities to an accepting friend.
Later that night I thought about that experience. I was surprised by Sue’s thoughts. I wouldn’t have matched those insecurities with her, nor did I think of her that way. So, if I was surprised by how she felt, she was probably surprised about what I expressed as my insecurities. Taking it even further, if she didn’t expect me to feel that way about myself, then probably nobody expects me to feel that way. So, if nobody tunes into my insecurities, why do I even have them? Why am I the only one in the world who cares about what I am insecure about? Are you getting my drift here? Self-doubt and insecurities exist only in our minds. They are an inside job. Why go through all that bother to construct them and keep them viable when nobody cares? Does that make sense?
What if we walked into a room and expected everyone to like us, to gravitate to us, to be interested in what we had to say? It’s possible to feel that way and it’s way better than feeling inadequate, out of place, not cared for or alienated from the group. Think about it. Insecurities don’t have to be our traveling partners throughout life. Maybe they served a purpose, but not anymore. If that is the case, it might be time to part ways with thoughts that keep you small and proceed as the whole, complete being that you are.
Please share with someone you love.